Francesca Dattilo, MSW
Certified Law of Attraction Coach
Certified Style Coach (MIASC Accred.)

Call me:  613.204.0781


  • By Francesca Dattilo
  • 28 Sep, 2017

Have you ever met someone who appeared very confident at first and then the more you got to know them you realized they lacked genuine self-confidence?    Perhaps, initially they came off quite assertive, even a little aggressive.   Yet, deep down they felt small.  

Or, you have met someone who is quite capable, competent, intelligent but they doubt themselves all the time.   They apologize too frequently and worry too much about upsetting or disappointing others. And, this doubt prevents them from taking on new challenges and growing.  

As a Style Coach(™), I work with a person from the inside-out; introducing them to confidence-boosting tools and techniques while showing them how to look good on the outside.   Confidence is a state of mind which we can learn, nurture, develop and experience.  Your confidence level can be seen by your body language, the way you dress, the use of your voice or lack thereof and your actions.

Nurturing a confident attitude is a habit that positively affects every area of your life, not just your style.  When you have authentic confidence you:

  • Have a balanced understanding of your strengths and resources
  • Are clear on your values and live by them
  • Trust in your capabilities
  • Are less concerned with the opinions of others
  • Are internally motivated, rather than motivated by the need to impress others
  • You speak your truth assertively & with compassion

Although, there are some people who lack confidence regularly.   For many of us, it is natural for our confidence to wax and wane depending on the day, the circumstances and the context of the situation.   When we are taking on a new challenge, for example: a new job, we may not feel so competent or capable.  

At these times, it is helpful to nurture your confidence level.   I like using an exercise called “The Trophy & Medal Room” Exercise with my clients.   I encourage you to try it for yourself:

Take a moment to connect to a time or times in your life when you took on a challenge and succeeded.   Perhaps it was an achievement you felt proud of.   Maybe, you were even recognized for your efforts; an award, certificate, promotion.   Or, you were acknowledged and appreciated by your loved ones.   It could be a time when you shone and felt the most yourself.   Or, it could even be a wise decision you made by listening to your internal wisdom.   You knew it was the best thing for you, even if no one else did.  

Reflect on these key moments.   Let yourself relive the experiences.   See what you saw, what you heard and FEEL how good you felt.   Play the movie in your mind vividly.   Then record your memory as though it is happening in the present; what you see, hear, smell, taste, touch.   Stay connected to the feeling of the experience.  

When you need an extra boost of confidence review your “Trophy & Medal Room” exercise to reconnect you to your power.  

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